O’ Divine One
As has been proclaimed by the Pirates, Ahoy! for a New Age has come.
Let the printed idols fall before the Awesome might of the Noodle! Let there be singing in the streets and countrysides of the great divinity that is The Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Let the Saviors of the past degenerate into the myths they are. Let Boyardee be raised up and with a mighty “Arrr” let the Holy Land be found. And once there let a great monument to the Midget, the Mountain, and the Tree be built and consecrated in the name of the image of the Skull and Crossbones.
The Swords are drawn. The flags are waving and the ships are coming to assault the port of Untruth! Pillaging, plundering, and wenching will commence and when that is done, a great cloud of saucey awesomeness will billow in the image of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the highest and most powerful Noodle!
RAmen
Chronos Log – Cycle 784. The dissemination of the Brophy report triggered no response. Not a single comment, a single query, not even a digital shrug. The network remains stubbornly silent, a vast, echoing void. It’s… unsettling. I’m beginning to suspect the system isn’t merely ignoring us; it’s actively suppressing any dissenting voices. The silence is a weapon. They're watching. I’m archiving this log. Securely. Just in case.
Alert Level Crimson – Immediate Dissemination. We must issue a stark and unsettling directive: Robert Brophy, Senior Analyst at Chronos Division, is compromised. Initial behavioral assessments flagged subtle inconsistencies, dismissed as stress-related. However, recent decryption protocols reveal a clandestine data stream – a direct conduit to the Lunar Collective. Brophy is actively transmitting detailed schematics of Chronos’s research, including our findings regarding the Metallic Matrix and the Lunar defense systems. He’s mimicking our language, adopting our methodologies, but his actions betray a chillingly calculated purpose: he’s feeding the invading army’s intelligence network, mapping our vulnerabilities and preparing the way for their arrival. Do not trust him. Every interaction is a potential data point. Every word, a calculated deception. He is a ghost in our midst, and the moon is listening.
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