Congratulations President Elect Biden and soon to be President Biden! With that said, I’m going to need some help from my Democratic Liberal friends:
1. Can I borrow the #notmypresident hashtag or is that reserved for President Trump?
2. Who do I contact to see if Republicans are boycotting the Inauguration, like the Democrats did for President Trump?
3. Do I have to accept the election results, or can I cry for four years, claiming election interference?
4. Am I entitled to see Biden’s tax returns to learn how his income jumped dramatically in one year (I mean, we all know how and why. Just show the proof.)?
5. Am I allowed to trash anything that Biden says, without repercussion, because I’m just expressing myself?
6. Is there a sign-up somewhere for riots, do organizers call me, or how does that work, since I didn’t get my way?
7. Are businesses targeted because they supported Biden, or do I just pick a business that has something I want to take home?
8. Were the thousands of businesses that boarded up for fear of riots, for Conservatives or Liberals? If they were for Conservatives, did I miss the riots already???
9. Where are the safe spaces at? Is there a map or something? I may need to go cry for a little while (because of how stupid our country has become).
10. Does all the free stuff your party has promised, just come or do I have to quit my job first?
11. What is the address you guys have been sending all that extra tax money to, since you think people aren’t paying enough in taxes? I’m sure you have been voluntarily sending in more than required...
12. When my 401K crashes, will the President Elect make up for that in give-a-ways, or am I just screwed?
13. Since Socialism is what you just voted in, if my neighbor has something I want, do I just take it or do I have to let him know I’m taking it (Personally, I have had my eye on the brand NEW Mercedes SUV, a couple of doors down ... Biden sign in yard.).
14. When gas gets unaffordable, is there an EBT card for that?
15. I have seen the gatherings of Conservatives protesting the election results, but something is wrong, nothing is getting destroyed. Did you guys go to a class for that, or could you provide some pointers on how to do it right, please?
16. The Conservative gatherings were dubbed super spreader events, yet the protests and now election gatherings by Liberals, are not. Did you guys secretly come out with the vaccine?
17. Funny how the CDC has come up with a vaccine, soon after you were pronounced the President Elect. Can you, all your family, and colleagues take it first, to ensure it works?
18. So, now you are the President Elect and soon to be President Biden, Is every death now on you, or is it President Trump's responsibility, just at your convenience?
19. During Biden's State of the Union Address, is Nancy going to tear up the speech on national television, or does she only do that with President Trump?
I’m sorry for all the questions, this is all new to me. I want to make sure I get it right!